Yub Nub

My top ten list of George Lucas’ worst mistakes, when it comes to Star Wars.

1 – Midi-chlorians
In my opinion the worst mistake Lucas has made. Introducing the Midi-chlorians. To “explain” the Force. The Force shouldn’t be explained! It has taken away some of the mystery. And it’s just plain stupid. What, you can take a blood sample and measure how powerful a Jedi is? Stupid stupid stupid.
I realize that they were introduced so we could have the “force-born” Anakin, possibly made by Darth Plageuis or Sidious by manipulating Midi-chlorians. But they could have done that without Midi-chlorians. Just have some strange, unexplained dark Sith power.
The Midi-chlorians have ruined the Force, in my opinion.

2 – Hayden Christensen in Return of the Jedi
I personally don’t mind Hayden. He was pretty good in Sith. But he had no business being in ROTJ. It makes no sense, no sense at all. The good Anakin died when he became Vader? This saga is supposed to be all about Anakin, you’re telling me he died halfway through?
Whatever happened to “there’s still good in him”? I guess the end of ROTJ wasn’t about the redemption of Anakin Skywalker, it was about the redemption of Darth Vader. Cause Anakin obviously wasn’t around anymore. Again, it’s stupid and it ruins everything.

3 – C3PO built by Anakin
Criminally stupid. Anakin built C3PO? How contrived can you get? Threepio is supposed to be a standard protocol droid. Not Anakin’s pet project. It’s wrong. I hate it. It must die. Die slowly, and painfully. Next thing you’ll tell us that Chewbacca built R2?

4 – Jar-Jar Binks, the most hated CGI figure since Michael Jackson
There’s a reason everybody hates him… he sucks. Hah. Well, if only there was less of him. In the first movie he almost seems like the main character. Then he just disappears. Funny how the prequels get better and better the less Jar Jar is in there.
I really don’t hate him with a passion, like everyone else. But there’s too much of him, too annoying. And just because Yoda is cute, that doesn’t mean everyone should have speech impediments.
Speaking of Yoda, do you think he gets it on with Yaddle? I mean they’re the only two of the species we’ve seen. You’d think they’d try to procreate or something. Whills or not.

5 – Greedo shoots first
This is the one everyone is always talking about. I think it has been blown a little out of proportion. It’s not really a big deal, it doesn’t change Han that much. It’s not like we were all hating Han Solo and then hugely surprised when he ended up being a good guy. I think if Han had shot first in the original movie then no one would have blinked, no one would have said “that’s wrong”. Unlike my other points here, they would have been wrong even if they had been in the original movie.
Buuuut, nonetheless. Having Greedo shoot first is stupid. Political correctness. And it’s one of those things that Georgie boy can’t explain by “we didn’t have the technology back then to tell the story I wanted to tell”. It’s stupid and it makes no sense, but really, stop making a big deal out of it, people.

6 – Jabba the Hut in A New Hope
I thought it was kind of cool at first. Having Jabba in the special edition. But now? Not so much. It just doesn’t work. That bit where Han walks over Jabba’s tail. And the “wonderful human being”? No no no. Jabba shouldn’t be comic relief. The scene serves no purpose, he’s much better left to Return of the Jedi.

7 – Chewbacca in Revenge of the Sith
Why? Again, why? It’s such a giant universe, why do the movies have to be so inbred? It’s the same as C3PO and Boba Fett. It’s name dropping, putting characters in where they don’t fit just so the fans can go “oooh”.
I love Wookies. But Chewie deserved better than that.

8 – Luke and Leia kissing
Ew. Okay, there are only two possibilities:
1) Lucas wasn’t planning on them being brother and sister.
Or
2) Lucas is a big giant sicko.
Slim pickens.

9 – Not making more Ewok movies
The Ewok movies ruled!

10 – Star Wars Holiday Special
Nuff said!

Those were the ones that came to mind. I’m sure I have forgotten some. Feel free to leave your own additions in comments or the guestbook.

Now, back to work! ZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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